Ok, before you interrupt and say "hey, these commercials are actually pretty cute!" what with the retro look, including hula girls, Godzilla, etc. let me just say that I agree with you- the ORIGINAL Subway "Five Dollar Foot Long" commercials were pretty cute. But almost before you could blink, the Suits at Subway decided that it was time to pretend that the "Five Dollar Foot Long" had become a popular jingle, and it was timee to unleash the Mother of All Obnoxious Commercial Concepts- the Man on the Street Sing-Along!!
That's right, folks- because this is the American Idol Judge Judy I Want To Be On Television And I Don't Care What I Have To Do To Get There generation, Subway has no problem getting drooling, overweight pasty morons to stand in front of cameras and sing "Five Dollar Foot Longs" and then giggle as if they've just done something funny, instead of humiliating themselves in front of millions of people and giving their children something to cringe about someday. As if people all over America have embraced "Five Dollar Foot Longs" as the "Where's The Beef?" of our time. Yep, this jingle has captured the hearts and minds of America, all right. Of course it has.
So to hell with the hula girls and Godzilla clips and Mimes and finding creative ways to get people to make what I guess is a "foot long" sign with their hands. Just take a video camera into the street and get dumbasses to display their lack of singing talent instead. Sure, the result is a commercial that makes you want to scrape off your ears with a cheese grater, but at least it didn't cost you much of anything to produce.
As for the people who debase themselves for their fifteen minutes of fame? They've given those grinning morons who make up the "Viva Viagra" band someone to look down on. Hope it makes them proud.
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