Saturday, April 17, 2010

Life is so Simple when you are as dumb as a bag of rocks



I don't know why America's Natural Gas companies are spending so much money trying to convince us that we should follow our nation's Lowest Common Denominator in deciding which way to go in achieving Energy Independence. If you watch MSNBC, CNN, etc. you have probably been rendered numb by the apparently endless parade of "I don't know anything about this, but here's my opinion" choads willing to stand in front of bright blue backgrounds and offer pearls of ignorance concerning this very important topic. You've certainly noticed by now that all of these Average Americans have several things in common:

1. They each give the same requisite, passing, grudging reference to solar and wind power before casually explaining why it's stupid and won't work

2. They each tell us in an offhandedly matter-of-fact manner that the United States has practically ENDLESS supplies of oil, and gee, why aren't we getting at it? (Because it's under those stupid National Parks and Wildlife refuges, or within frisbee distance of popular beaches, but we aren't told this)

3. They are very easily persuaded by the "argument" for Natural Gas, even while admitting that they don't know what it is or how it would work

4. They all agree that this means "problem solved, ("Eureka") yay, glad we didn't have to give that more than ten seconds of thought or visit more than one website to get the "answer."

It was hard to choose which video to embed for this post. I finally decided to pick this one, because it does vary slightly from the usual message. This woman comes right out and admits that she truly doesn't have the slightest clue about the subject she's been asked to comment on- "Giga What? I mean, it sounds like a lot!"- and that America's Natural Gas providers convinced her that they have all the answers in roughly the time it takes for an average person (not her) to tie her shoes. I mean, seriously, this woman makes Victoria Jackson look like a candidate for Mensa.

And she's perfectly happy with that, because she's achieved her "Giga Eureka." I'm sure she's really proud of that line. Or she will be, once she finds out what "giga" means. Next- looking up the word "Eureka." As soon as Glenn Beck goes to commercial. Because seriously- "I was just reading...? Not buying it.

1 comment:

  1. So, what's this woman's next gig? Whining because the Democrats want to reduce how much she spends on health care? Talking about moldy minutes? Protesting soda taxes? Weaseling out of paying her debts? Shilling for e-Harmony? It's got to be something stupid.

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