Sunday, July 18, 2010
Enjoy your last day on Earth, you little prick
There is so much wrong with this commercial for Chrysler's archaic behemoth, the "Town and Country" (so called, I figure, because it's big enough to have it's own zip code.)
First, it seems to be operating on the premise that there's something very funny about a little kid being threatened with a beating after school. I thought we were way past the Being Beaten Up Is Hilarious theme, but ok- this is going to work, I think, because the intended victim is going to escape the bullies. Yay intended victim!
So the kid dashes down the road and escapes the bullies because his mom inexplicably leaves the hatch to the family land monster open for him to leap into (Do Not Attempt, kids.) Since the car is a fortress, complete with security cameras (for Christ's sake, how f--ing helpless can we get, people?) the bullies have been defeated. Yay intended victim! Yay mom (though her "there you are sweety!" is a bit treacly for me- I'd rather hear her ask "what did you do, propel yourself into the back of the car? Why did you do that? Come to think of it, why did I have that hatch open- is this how you get in the car EVERY afternoon?")
Ah, but being a little kid, Intended Victim just can't leave well enough alone. Suddenly he becomes an ass, stinging his tongue out at his tormentors and giving them a mocking leer as Mommy takes him home in the family's life-saving Suburban Tank. And now we get a little insight as to why this kid was a target- he's not a little kid worthy of our sympathy after all. He's that insipid little creep we all remember from school- the one who was the bravest guy in the world when holding on to his mom or dad's leg, and nowhere to be seen when mom and dad were not around.
The one who was always too damned stupid to remember that tomorrow is another day, and the people you torment have long memories. Tomorrow, you'll get no sympathy from me, you idiot. I suggest you discuss the situation with your mom over a nice hot plate of Kraft Mac' n Cheese tonight.
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He's that insipid little creep we all remember from school- the one who was the bravest guy in the world when holding on to his mom or dad's leg, and nowhere to be seen when mom and dad were not around.
ReplyDeleteI believe that Larry Linville used to play a guy like that on a sitcom for five seasons.
Did you watch the commercial? The dialogue of the ad was 'Hey Parker. Wanna race me home? Bet I can beat you there!'. The point of running to the car, and the subsequent tongue-sticking, was to laugh at his friends (not his tormentors) at his innovative way to win the competition - not to escape being flayed alive at the hands of their butcher knives, as you'd make it out to be.
ReplyDeleteHow is that 'laughing at bullying'? Your blog would be a lot more enjoyable if you didn't make yourself so easily hatable by over-reaching to such a melodramatic degree in finding reasons to hate a commercial.
"not to escape being flayed alive at the hands of their butcher knives, as you'd make it out to be."
ReplyDelete"Your blog would be a lot more enjoyable if you didn't make yourself so easily hatable by over-reaching to such a melodramatic degree..."
Um, ok Jason. Whatever you say.
I also hate this commercial. Why does he hop in the vehicle if he is victorious in this race? That makes no sense. I also agree to why does mom have the back door open? She then acts surprised when he poofs into the back seat, "Oh there you are."
ReplyDeleteDUMB! There is too much mystery involved in this commercial. Last time I checked they are supposed to be quick and too the point, not leaving me guessing for more information.
I have such a hatred for this commercial especially today because I am watching a baseball game and it seems to be on every commercial break.
I'm pretty sure Chrysler redid the commercial after it was released, and changed the kids voice at the beginning to change the theme from a threatened beatdown to a race. Probably some angry parents protested, or something. That's why the kid is hiding behind a tree... who hides if they're running a race?
ReplyDeleteThe audio and video don't mesh. The audio begins with "Hey Parker! Wanna race home? Bet I can beat you there." Makes it seem like some friendly competition. But the video cues all point to some kid being threatened by bullies (Indeed...if he is trying to win a race, why hide behind trees?) I agree with the previous comment. They re-dubbed and edited the commercial after some negative feedback by some test audiences.
ReplyDelete