Pointless Nightmare Fuel, Courtesy of AT&T

Somehow, AT&T tracked down the characters who were roaming through my brain as I tossed and turned and tried to sleep off my last bender and put them into a commercial.

This isn't a bad commercial, as far as cell phone ads go, though I do find the conclusion more than a little depressing and pointless.  First of all, Daddy is telling a bedtime story to Junior because Daddy is too busy flying around the world whoring for money to actually be WITH his child.  (Junior will thank you later, Daddy.  Probably through Facebook, but hey, you set this up.)  Second, absolutely nothing his happening here that wasn't perfectly possible before the creation of cell phones.  Fifty years ago, Daddies were calling their little sons from hotel rooms and reading them bedtime stories, because fifty years ago, there were these things called phones and books.  They just had wires and actual pages.  I don't get how what we see here is an improvement on that.

But I still think that the "fairy tale" figures wandering their way to Junior's house are far more creepy than cute, more demonic than magical.  If I looked out my window and saw these things staring back at me, I would probably go into shock.  I would at the very least swear off the Smirnoffs for a week or two.