(Or, to put it more simply, this Dr. Pepper Fansville Commercial.)
1. We are actually watching two people who are breaking up because their teams are no longer rivals, and they are no longer rivals because Conference Pinball has come for their teams. Anyone who doesn't follow college football may not know this, but there are approximately 4200 conferences which include 780,000 colleges and every year, the names of the schools are thrown into a blender and randomly poured back out into these conferences. So if you don't just follow your college football team but instead care about what conference they are in, well, be prepared for a very unsettled and confusing life which, if you live long enough, will see your favorite team as a member of every single conference at some point.
2. Yes, that's a can of No Sugar Dr. Pepper Really Not Cough Syrup you're holding there, which you'd know if you just looked at it instead of awkwardly holding it up so that the viewing audience can see the label. Hey, maybe this conference-switch thing is just a lame excuse being handed to this girl by a guy who doesn't want to admit that he's not into football-obsessed weirdos who are also illiterate?
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