Can we agree that "Land Cruiser" is the most pretentious name Toyota could possibly have invented to label this more recent version of Gas-Guzzling, Parking-Space Straddling, Bank Account-draining Suburban Grocery Hauler?
I'll give Toyota a little credit for truth in advertising, at least- "Land Cruiser" suggests that this thing is basically a passenger ship that glides over pavement* instead of water. It's not a car, it's not a truck, it's a freaking Boat. It doesn't roll, it Cruises. It's massive. We get it, Toyota. And yet, we don't get it at all. Why IS this even a thing?
*We all know that not one person in a thousand who purchases one of these land-dwelling dirigibles is actually going to get it dirty with intent. These things are going to be used to bring kids to soccer practice on Saturday and everything else home from Costco on Sunday. Give me a break.
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