TurboTax hates people

I could go along with the YouTube commenters who want to focus on how rude the woman in this ad is.  And I could do an entire post based solely on that aspect of the ad- she bumps into a guy she knows at a coffee shop who tells her that he invented this App and it's doing great.  He starts to give her some details about the App, and two seconds later she decides that his idea is not only really stupid, but it's not worth one more moment of her time, and she's relieved to be "rescued" by the tax person who randomly called her to ask if this is a good time to go over her tax return "line by line."

She behaves as if she's just been given a reprieve by the governor because she can't simply be A)  nice to the guy and let him talk for a minute or so before wishing him well and moving on, or B) brutally honest and tell him she's so uninterested that she'd rather talk to some tax choad on her phone than listen to one more word out of his stupid face.

I could do that, but that would be following the YouTube commenter script, which if you check it out gets really, really ugly- I mean, these guys really, really don't like women at all.  They've got issues.  I'm not going to quote them, but there it is.  I'm not following their lead.

Instead, I'll just point out that sitting in a coffee shop using it's easily-hackable public WiFi is probably NOT the perfect place to "go over your taxes, line by line."  No matter how desperately you want to end a conversation you've decided you just can't bear to continue for some reason.  But I'm sure that when this woman DOES go through her taxes "line by line," she'll continue to do it without using earbuds or anything like that, because there's nothing private about tax forms after all and I'm sure everybody in that shop is as super-interested in hearing it as she is in avoiding what probably would have been a 2-minute conversation that made a fellow human being feel a little better about his accomplishments.

Two points about this iPhone x "Color Flood" ad

1.  It's an iPhone commercial.  In other words, Much Ado About Nothing and just another sad attempt to get people who already own a perfectly good iPhone to shell out a thousand dollars to "upgrade" it Because Hey It's Just Money Burning a Hole in my Pocket.  I mean, I guess you could convince yourself that you really "need".....ummm.....better color than your current phone offers.  I guess you could.  You probably can, if you've already purched thousand-dollar phones in the past.  So you probably don't need this commercial at all.  What a waste of effort.  Which brings us to....

2.  What a waste of effort.  In the days before CGI, this commercial might justifiably be lauded as a masterstroke of direction and gain plaudits for it's brilliant choreography.  Now we know some jackass with a computer just vomited this out after a few hours of rendering with a software program, and it probably includes no more than a dozen actual human beings jumping around with the rest being digital creations.  Which makes it all just another boring iPhone ad trying to convince us that a thousand dollars is NOT too much to spend for a phone because Hey Check out the Color.

But hey, who am I kidding.  Half of you are probably off to the Apple store like an army of drooling lemmings with credit card in hand to buy the Perfect Phone for the First Quarter of 2019.  Morons.

Wait....what?

So if you are so burned out on life that you can't be bothered to notice that your grandchild has opened up a box of something and is spilling it all over the place, the smart thing to do is book a flight to a vineyard where you can get drunk and ignore the fact that your grandchild is running through a vineyard all over the place?

Seems to me that the grandmother in this ad (that's not the kids mother, is it?  She looks at least sixty years older than the kid, right?) doesn't need a break as much as the people working in the grocery store, who have to clean up after little kids who aren't being tended to by idiot old people who bring their grandchildren to stores and let those grandchildren treat the produce like toys.  Just sayin'.

But those people at Liberty Tax never told me nothing about this

I'm a little concerned about an adult with at least one dependent child who is not aware that child care costs are deductable.  Not for this guy's wallet, but for that child.  Because I don't have any kids, but because I've filled out tax forms before I'm aware that you can claim child care costs and get a deduction for them.

Somehow, this stupid slob managed to get someone to have sex with him, produce a kid, incur child care expenses, and yet through all that never learn that those expenses are deductable.  I don't know how this happened unless he's either a pampered brat who until this year always had this stuff done for him (maybe he's recently divorced from a woman who did the taxes for the family before she got sick of being married to a clueless child) or he's just really, really stupid and it never occurred to him that JUST MAYBE he should ask if he could deduct child care expenses before just shrugging and sending the feds more money than they were entitled to.

Oh, wait- there's another possibility.  Maybe he spent years moving from state to state to avoid paying child support before finally being tracked down by the authorities and being forced into accepting his financial responsibilities.  Now that he's being compelled to act like an adult, he needs to learn the rules, including the rules involving the deduction of child care costs.

Who really needs to "be prepared," TruStage?

If I were to suddenly die, all my problems would be instantly solved.  What calls do I have to make, what papers do I have to sign, before I die?  Oh, none?  Then what do I have to worry about?

I'm not the one who is supposed to "be prepared."  This commercial isn't about the person who has suddenly kicked off at all.  It's about all those deadbeats and freeloaders who have been living off the body of the recently deseased and who now realize that the awesome ride is over and it's time to be Independent.  Finally.

So anyone who depends on me for money, a place to live, internet connectivity, regular cellphone updates, vacations, rides to soccer practice G-D DAMN IT IT NEVER ENDS DOES IT ITS ALL ABOUT YOU ALL THE TIME needs to prepare for that moment WHICH WILL COME SOMEDAY I PROMISE YOU when I am no longer around TO BE BLED TO DEATH BY YOUR ENDLESS DEMANDS.  All of YOU have to prepare for the day you can no longer be leeches sucking the very LIFE out that PERSON YOU KNOW WHO WORKS FOR A LIVING AND PROVIDES ALL THIS FOR YOU.  That means getting a job and saving your money and preparing for the day when YOU GET TO TAKE CARE OF YOURSELVES.

In short, this commercial has nothing to do with me at all.  It's not a warning for me.  It's a warning for you.  Because whatever problems pop up because I died and didn't leave you enough money to continue your dream life without labor, they are going to be your problems, not mine.  I'll be enjoying the sweet, sweet embrace of warm, lovely death.  Away from you, you grasping, life-sucking money vampires. 

Love ya bunches!

Oh Oh Oh it's ear-bleeding crap from Once Weekly Ozempic

The only thing more cringe-worthy than this monstrously stupid ad is the series of comments that follow it on YouTube.  Seriously, they basically come down to this:

Several people simply quote the lyrics.  And others give those people thumbs-up for their "comments." 

One person says that the song "sounds a lot like 'it's magic' by Selena Gomez."  I wish I was kidding.  I'm not. 

Almost nobody actually points out that this comercial is mind-numbingly stupid and makes you want to fly to Los Angeles, track down the producers, and punch them in the face as hard as humanly possible.  And then track down all the stupid people who agreed to be in this ad and punch them even harder.  And then track down the surviving members of Pilot, hold a gun to their heads, and make them swear that they simply lost the copyright to their only hit and had no say in it's use in this horrible lump of a dangerous medication commercial.*

*I've seen this nasty stain on the soul of television at least a dozen times, and I still can't remember what Disease Not As Bad As The Symptoms Ozempic is supposed to treat.  The screen tells me that Ozempic is a Semaglutide Injection, which sounds something I'd rather avoid in any case.

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from John F. Jamele on January 11, 2019   Beautiful and came very fast   I was surprised when this showed up two days after I ordered it; very impressive service. The belt itself is very attractive and sized exactly as ordered. Definitely recommend.

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