...is the story of America itself. We are a fat, lazy, stupid people who spend way, way too much time sitting on our ample backsides staring at screens (even at home, where our number one activity is to watch other people do things on television or our laptops) and then complaining that we "don't have time" to eat healthy.
Look at this commercial again. Every single person in it is overweight. The women who are not morbidly obese are certainly Overweight according to the Evil Evil Racist Body Mass Index. The men all have pot bellies, which means they are considered "straight sized" and probably pass as "slim" in most communities today. But if you compare this to an office scene captured on tape in the 1970s, you'd see the difference is pretty damn stark. Fat is now Normal. And it's not a problem to be solved with a healthy diet and exercise, but with a little pill with a "great big story to tell." Um, ok then.
I see a lot of people commenting how much they like the vibe of this ad; the infectious smile of this girl, her energy as she moves from room to room with her favorite cleaning utensil, the way her eyes widen in amazement as she notes how much of her hair she picked up this time....
Me being Me, I'm more concerned that this woman is losing so much of her hair every freaking time washes and dries it. What kind of drugs is she on that is making this much hair loss a common thing for her? Is she literally yanking it out with the towel? Also, if I lost anywhere near as much hair as this woman did I sure as heck wouldn't pick BLINDING WHITE as my house's color scheme.
One more thing- for chrissakes lady, go out and make some friends. There's more to life than dusting. You enjoy this way too much. Get some help.
I'm sorry, but who the hell meets a blind date at their OWN APARTMENT? This woman seems pretty cute (if prone to snap judgments and indecisiveness.) She can find guys out in the Real World. But she not only agrees to a blind date, but she gives the guy her address, has him show up at her place, and immediately offers him a beer- isn't he going to take her out to dinner? Holy crap, did she make him dinner, too? What is going on here? Is this woman still single? How do I get her to call me?
Who is the male ad writer who came up with this fantasy nonsense? There are very good reasons why none of this happens in real life. For one thing, it simply shouldn't. How STUPID would a woman have to be to have a blind date meet her at her apartment instead of a public place, and instantly offer him alcohol instead of heading out the door? Is this woman's biological clock ticking THAT loudly?
What is the plan for tonight? Sit around the apartment, talk and drink beer? That's a nice activity when you've established yourselves as a couple. Except for the talking part, it's remarkably like being married. But a FIRST DATE? This woman is dressed to the nines, too. Who is she trying to impress? Her cat?
What happens if the date goes badly? How does she get rid of this guy? He's already in your place. He's already got alcohol in you- thanks to your own situational blindless and almost criminal naivete. Even if he leaves quietly, he knows where you live now. NOTHING about this situation comes off as something arranged by a mature, sensible adult female. Yet she's trying to decide if he is worthy of the "good" beer in the fridge. And that's another thing- who are the other two beers for? Is she doing this again later tonight? Does she have already have a boyfriend who is out for the night that she's cheating on?
I'm sorry, but listening to this guy wax poetic about "his music" and "his home" and "his life" as he waltzes around what looks to be a million-dollar loft apartment in downtown Manhattan is just a little too much for me. I've seriously never cared less about anyone in my entire life,* but I guess that works out ok, because when this guy gets done there's really no room for anyone else to care about him, anyway.
Loan Depot is best known for selling adjustable-rate mortgages (they make up the majority of the $1.8 billion in business they did in the housing market last year.) They are also noteworthy for giving their CEO a $42 million dollar bonus a few years back. Their customer base tends to be people with less than stellar credit ratings who are willing to sign on the dotted line to pay very high-interest mortgage payments forever rather than live within their means in apartments which may NOT have 360 degree views of the Manhattan skyline.
Back to this idiot- man, I wish I could adequately describe how very little I give a flying damn about your freaking music and your plants and wish you'd just grow up and accept the reality of being an adult and maintaining a sustainable budget instead of placing yourself in a situation where you'll be demanding debt relief inside of a year or two. Hate to tell you this, but our government only bails out banks, not people. When you and your plants and your albums get tossed on to the sidewalk, Loan Depot will flip that apartment, maybe even handing it off to someone who can afford it. You can move your crap back in to mommy's basement; hope there's room for you to frolic in front of the washer-dryer if you can work up the enthusiasm. No, I don't.
*this sentiment may change the next time The New York Times publishes an article about a young performance artist struggling to find a condo for under $1.5 million in the Right Neighborhood. I will probably care about that person's "problem" even less.
Nothing may be more important to these little girls than clearer skin, but I suspect that their skin condition takes a back seat to $$$ that can be made in exploiting these little girls when it comes to their parents.
Am I wrong, or is there something very, very disturbing about the use of scantily-clad minor girls in commercials for drugs which carry significant risk of severe side effects, or drugs in general, or ANYTHING IN GENERAL?
I almost feel guilty in making this post; it's the very definition of Punching Down. I mean, the snark writes itself. How absolutely out of touch, desperate and gullible do you have to be to buy in to this level of grift?
Well, I get at least one answer from the comment section- the person who posted "I need a reading, but I don't have any money." I don't wonder why a person who thinks they "need a reading" doesn't have any money. It's not just that fools and their money are soon parted; it's surprising when they manage to get together in the first place. I'm absolutely convinced that if you gave 1000 poor people a million dollars each, in 90 days they would be more poor than they were when they received the money. People who call "California Psychics," think they are saving money by getting dinner at the local fast-food drive-thru, "need" the latest iPhone, take "vacations" from their part-time jobs and plan to pay for them using next year's tax refund are all the same: Determined to never, ever have excess money in their wallets.
Never mind drug testing; if you get any kind of government assistance for shelter, food, medicine etc. your phone records ought to be checked for California Psychics and if it turns out you are spending so much as a single dollar on these scammers I want you cut off. Otherwise, us taxpayers are subsidizing your Stupid, and I am so very sick of subsidizing Stupid. Get your palm and chakras read on your own dime. Or take my free reading: you are destined to be poor. Because you are The Dumb. Now move on and find something else to do with your time that doesn't involve buying something you don't need and can't afford.
"Attention listeners who have been skipping out on paying your taxes because you figured that the IRS has been sufficiently gutted by Republican Presidents and Republican Congresses and would never find the needle in the haystack that is your criminal behavior: Here's some bad news for you! The Big Bad Government has appropriated eighty BILLION dollars to crack down on YOU, Mr. Jim Jones of 116 Maple Street! They are only seconds away from sending you a bill for the money you actually owe as your fair share for keeping society functional! You have two choices- you can pay that bill, or you can call Optima Tax Relief, give that company some of your money, and THEN pay that bill!"
I owed a lot of money to my landlady. I TRIED to make payments, but didn't actually do so. Stunningly, my Good Intentions meant nothing to my cruel, vicious landlady who had the equally cruel and vicious Law on her side. She told me I had to pay my rent, or I had to move out. I didn't know what to do! I mean, I LIKE my money and I want to KEEP it! Can't someone come up with Optima Squatters Relief?
